Tuesday, January 24, 2012

About falling- not in love, but actually falling...

I have yet to take a tumble in relation to my fibrofuckingmyalgia. I suppose it has taken its time fucking with me in other ways so it will save the falling for when I'm on concrete or out in public wearing a skirt so I can do the utmost damage or suffer the utmost in upskirting.

Over on the Facebook place, this link was posted about Fibrofuckingmyalgia and Falls. Now, while I haven't had a fall as the result of this stupid disease, something struck me...

This part:
Researchers say they found low muscle strength in the legs, low function in the knees and hips, and poor balance and agility in the fibromyalgia group.

My total knee replacement recovery was delayed by a then-undiagnosed fibrofuckingmyalgia. And now my thigh muscles are shot. I just assumed that my thighs were atrophied from the fact that they didn't do much other than hurt and bitch about their lives for over a year. The right side was worse than the left because I hurt my right knee way back in 2006. And in 2009, the left knee underwent cyborg assimilation surgery. As if that itself wasn't a bowl full of fairy farts and candy, that was when the undeniable and obvious signs of fibrofuckingmyalgia decided to raise its ugly head. Up till then, doctors- well, not doctors- just one in particular, would explain away the symptoms as to being from other problems. I'm not getting any younger, I'm overweight (that was his favorite, even when I wasn't overweight), osteoarthritis even when the pain was in the muscles and not the joints, thyroid disease that I've had since I was 18 and it was well-controlled and monitored (by him, no less!), and stress...

But, the knee replacement just shoved it all up into the face of the next doctor I had. By then, I'd taken to making lists and taking them with me to my doctor visits. But this isn't about that...

My leg muscles are shot and no matter what I do, they just don't build back up. And now I know why it has been so hard. Back in the day, I used to cycle. A lot. And that's a great way to build up one's legs. Except that my orthopedic surgeon specifically said not to bike ride. Stationary, sure. But not actual. And I have no place in my house in which to place a stationary bike (even if I could afford one). The doctor said that if I do decide to bike and then I wreck, I should "fling" myself to the right side so I don't damage my cyborg leg.

I thought about that and sort of chuckled. Then a while later, I remembered- in two year's of my biking life, I had three major accidents. And two of those were on safe bike paths. Where I live now has bike paths, but a lot of the "path" part is on the side of a road. So yeah... unless I build a special room for a stationary bike, the biking things isn't happening.

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